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The staff of Portalocity had had access to millions of dimensions over the past few millenia. They had explored planes few people knew existed, just for the sake of finding somewhere to open up a portal - money was in everything, after all.
And so it was that their final battle did not so much take place in the cramped confines of Portalocity HQ, but across several layers of time and space all at once. They fought valiantly for many hours. They suffered. They fought harder. They won some, and then they lost some more.
In the end, though, it wasn't so much an unlikely victory by the underdog as more of a total dramatic curbstomp.
There was only so much you could do when your enemy was a bunch of beings discorporate on the material plane, and a whimsical force of natural entropy.
Within the bowels of Portalocity HQ, and across fifty thousand other dimensions, one short Portalocity employee with thirty eyes and a carapace typed away at a console with his five front limbs.
The Portalocity staffer who had been promoted to PR the Klingon way just two days ago limped in, or rather crawled, as parts of his anatomy seemed to be missing. "ONE... more..." he managed, and then there was little left of him to manage.
The last Portalocity staffer did not pay attention to him. He/she/it kept typing, as the shadows drew closer. "WE HAVE MANAGED AN ACCURACY OF 98.7% IN COMPARISON TO OUR PROJECTED RESULT," he/she/it intoned. "WE WILL NOT LET ANYTHING KEEP US FROM ACHIEVING 100% ACCURACY."
Thirty seconds later, there was no more floor.
"WE ARE AT AN ACCURACY OF 99.5% AND COUNTING," it intoned.
And the ceiling.
"ACCURACY OF 99.8% AND COUNTING."
And its prehensile legs.
"ACCURACY OF 99.9%--"
And most of his torso.
"ACCURACY OF 100%. OBJECTIVE ACHIEVED. THIS IS A LEGENDARY OCCURANCE IN PORTALOCITY HIST--"
The clock struck seven, except there was no more clock left to strike. Nor was there a Portalocity HQ to strike at, and Brigadoon had just gone and lost its ability to tell time too, and Milliways Bar had just lost most of its parking lot.
The Nothing did not care.
It thundered on towards Fandom in one impossible wave, devouring everything in its wake as it finally breached Fandom's universe threshold, several light years away from the planet known as Earth.
On Fandom, the magic of the Causeway fizzled and died within seconds, like someone had pulled out a plug.
And across all inter-dimensional channels, there was suddenly and irrevocably... silence.
And so it was that their final battle did not so much take place in the cramped confines of Portalocity HQ, but across several layers of time and space all at once. They fought valiantly for many hours. They suffered. They fought harder. They won some, and then they lost some more.
In the end, though, it wasn't so much an unlikely victory by the underdog as more of a total dramatic curbstomp.
There was only so much you could do when your enemy was a bunch of beings discorporate on the material plane, and a whimsical force of natural entropy.
Within the bowels of Portalocity HQ, and across fifty thousand other dimensions, one short Portalocity employee with thirty eyes and a carapace typed away at a console with his five front limbs.
The Portalocity staffer who had been promoted to PR the Klingon way just two days ago limped in, or rather crawled, as parts of his anatomy seemed to be missing. "ONE... more..." he managed, and then there was little left of him to manage.
The last Portalocity staffer did not pay attention to him. He/she/it kept typing, as the shadows drew closer. "WE HAVE MANAGED AN ACCURACY OF 98.7% IN COMPARISON TO OUR PROJECTED RESULT," he/she/it intoned. "WE WILL NOT LET ANYTHING KEEP US FROM ACHIEVING 100% ACCURACY."
Thirty seconds later, there was no more floor.
"WE ARE AT AN ACCURACY OF 99.5% AND COUNTING," it intoned.
And the ceiling.
"ACCURACY OF 99.8% AND COUNTING."
And its prehensile legs.
"ACCURACY OF 99.9%--"
And most of his torso.
"ACCURACY OF 100%. OBJECTIVE ACHIEVED. THIS IS A LEGENDARY OCCURANCE IN PORTALOCITY HIST--"
The clock struck seven, except there was no more clock left to strike. Nor was there a Portalocity HQ to strike at, and Brigadoon had just gone and lost its ability to tell time too, and Milliways Bar had just lost most of its parking lot.
The Nothing did not care.
It thundered on towards Fandom in one impossible wave, devouring everything in its wake as it finally breached Fandom's universe threshold, several light years away from the planet known as Earth.
On Fandom, the magic of the Causeway fizzled and died within seconds, like someone had pulled out a plug.
And across all inter-dimensional channels, there was suddenly and irrevocably... silence.